CoNfEsSiOn!

alright after ppl spreading the 'secret'...i decided to confess le..I broke up with him...ya..it's true tat me n him is over..actually wanna remain as a 'secret' but he told some others le..so i juz b frank wif u all...although it's sort of pity but to let him b at least happier or to help both of us..i tink it's the best way le...if not he owaes worry a lot n i haf a lot pressure...i tot i did the right way but now i'm kind of regreting...feel like can't live without him..i'm still in a process of sorting out my feelings so...excuse me for tis period of time..i'm really veri sad these days...but some time i'm kind of acting to b alright...actually wan to act asif nth happen but i tink my acting skills not gd n some ppl noe le i've no point to continue the act..sometimes i laughed over a joke which is not tat funny den later i stop laughing n feel sad again..i tot jokes can help mie but i found out tat it's temporily not permantly...mayb now i can feel free to tok to the other guys le but is tis wat i really wan?i've been askin myself tis almost everyday...though sometimes it's a bit pressuring bein wif him but i feel veri xing fu...now i dunno wat i really feel...i really dunno wat to do now le..veri confused..dun really feel any more joy in life le..felt quite lonely..though my frens r still wif me...but do u noe how i really feel?i act or wanted to act asif i dun care but in my heart i really care...but now i can onli tell u i din ever regret liking u...but perhaps we shld not start tis relationship..or actually we din even start...we din even dare to tok to each other...now in the streets or in the bus...i saw those couples..i sort of envy them...at least they lurve each other n they dare to show their love to their partners..i wan tat feeling bac but do u tink it can b done?actually i tot aft we broke up can still b frens but who noes it's really damn difficult...i dunno how to say....he told me b4..'love some1 is by wanting him or her to b happy even if u urself is sad'...i agreed to tis line tat he told me..so now i'm actually wanting him to b happy..i can do anyting 4 him to make him happy..as long as he's happy nth matter to me...time will heal the wounds...hope so...the last ting i want to tell him is tat i still like u...i apologise if i've hurt u...but i'm not you xin de...pls forgive mie... i really dunno how to face him anymore..it really ended..hais
alright since i confessed abt the break up..hope nobody will still continue to tease us le..finally went online today...cauz all the while i'm avoiding tings..such as ppl askin abt the break up or watever..i now realise is no use to avoid u will haf to face the music..
P.S:the cca open house is ...terrible as in we dropped the roasted chicken n madms bu kao xin..veri scared when c them face black black but sometimes it's really not everyting is our fault..but juz wanna apologise to the madms...i'm sorry..
P.S.S:still hate sittin wif her..can't adapt..ppl r adapting like va yilin qh but i can't..i will nv like tis..tis is the worst sittin arrangement le..but mayb like xi sheng xiao wo,wan cheng da wo..did i say correctly?dunno lah...
homework n homework...dunno how to cope lah...STRESS!d&t dunno how to do..den muz revise tis n tat but can't settle myself down to study..force oso no use..can't help myself le...
-i lurve euuu-